When We Were Kings (The Wolf of Oberhame Book 1) Read online

  Maybe the bond between them was only in her head? Sometimes Leyli dared to hope it was more, but each time Tristan did a good job of proving her wrong. His touches were always gentle, but never improper. His attention was insistent, but not fawning. In so many ways he did treat her like a sister, but she just couldn't think of him like that. Not that she should hope for more. She'd told him that getting pregnant would kill her – and that was true – but so would the heartbreak.

  If he died, she couldn't take it. Not now, and certainly not if they were lovers. Closing her eyes, she relaxed under Drustin's hands. Finally, she understood what the Lion always said. That was the line they couldn't cross. He didn't mean physically, he meant mentally. If she allowed herself to get too attached, it could destroy her. The only way to survive the games was to learn how to do it alone. Maybe he could do that, but she wasn't sure she could.

  And maybe that's what this lesson was about. He had to know how much she depended on him. From the moment she woke up until she fell asleep on his chest, her entire life revolved around her partner. The day Merino bought her, Tristan said he'd fight with her because her first interest was living. She'd been willing to do anything to make sure she survived. That wasn't necessarily true anymore. Now, she'd be willing to do anything to make sure he did, and that made her vulnerable. One foolish mistake would get them both killed.

  When her body had been eased of the day's strain, she thanked the masseuse and got dressed. Like before, he found something to occupy his eyes until she was completely covered. Only then did he pull back the curtain, proving that yet another fighter waited for his turn to find relief. Leyli nodded at the man, but walked out without a word. Just like all the others, she had no idea what he was called, and she didn't bother to ask. Knowing meant that she'd care when he stopped showing up.

  Outside, it was dark, but a handful of men were still training. Most of those were the novice fighters. With more than twenty-five wins, she was no longer required to work after her last meal. As a regular, she got a few benefits. Two days a week she could cut short, or take one full day off. It was her reward for earning Merino money, and nothing else. Tristan made sure to take every one.

  But tonight his rooms were dark. The lantern didn't glow from the window. His sitting area looked as vacant as the place on the other side. When Leyli entered her own quarters, she couldn't hear a thing. Had he taken ill? Was he asleep or somewhere else? If he had another responsibility – which his talk with Merino implied – why didn't he just tell her?

  Unless it was too distasteful to share. Leyli crawled into bed feeling anything but tired. She hoped the massage would be enough to lull her body to sleep, but doubted it. The questions in her mind were relentless, and not having any answers only made it worse.

  It had been months since she'd slept alone, and her body knew it. Not even curling beside a pillow would help, but she tried. Every time she got close, Tristan's face sprang back into her mind. Something was wrong, and she didn't have a single hint of what it was.

  That's probably why she heard the thump from next door. Her eyes flew open, then Leyli heard it again, followed by what sounded like a muffled curse. A second later, the thud of bodies hit a wall. It was distant, but not distant enough. Alone in her rooms, the only noise was her breathing, and that wasn't enough to cover what was happening in her partner's room. Drustin's warning came back in a rush.

  The easiest way to get rid of the competition was to take them out in their sleep. Wave hadn't seemed pleased with Tristan, but was he truly that stupid? Could the Domn of Lanmont have bribed someone to deal with her? Before she even thought about it, Leyli was out of bed, hurrying across the room. She grabbed the door, careful not to be heard, shocked to find it wasn't locked. Easing it open, she crept in, her ears straining for sounds of the assailant.

  Someone was breathing hard, then a body crashed onto the bed, the mattress softening the blow. Flesh slapped together furiously. Leyli moved around the corner, ready to kill with her bare hands if she had to – and froze.

  The only light in the room was from the moon, pooling through the open shutters and onto the bed, but it was enough. It was too much. With her face twisted, her eyes clamped shut, and her hands clenching the sheets, a woman's body glistened damply. She was completely bare, except for the man pressed between her legs, thrashing against her. It took only one second for her mind to register what she'd walked in on before she backed away. It wasn't fast enough. Tristan looked up and their eyes met. The woman didn't even notice.

  Leyli spun, retreating as silently as she'd entered. She didn't want his slut to know she'd been there. It was bad enough that Tristan had seen. He'd told her to stay away, and now she knew why! He was playing the bull. Unfortunately, his cow was one she knew all too well. The Domna of Everton wasn't a woman that could be forgotten easily.

  She was also someone who would easily recognize Leyli's face.

  Chapter 22

  Curled against her pillows, Leyli didn't expect to fall asleep. Her body didn't agree. The Domna wouldn't dare risk being seen, which meant Leyli was safe so long as she kept to her own side of that door. It should have been enough to keep her vigilant, but wasn't. Tristan wasn't angry with her and that relief was more than she could take. Eventually her eyes closed, and she didn't even realize it had happened.

  Until her mattress shifted. She was awake before his hand touched her hair, but didn't stop Tristan from pushing it away from her face. When her eyes opened, his were waiting.

  "I told you to stay out of my rooms." He didn't sound angry.

  With a soft moan, Leyli scooted over, making room for him to sit. "I heard a crash and thought someone was trying to sneak in on you sleeping." She reached out for his arm. "I'm sorry."

  He sat, but turned to the dark wall. "Get a good view?"

  Her hand traced the damaged skin on his forearm. "I'm honestly sorry. You never bring them to your room. I didn't know. As soon as I saw it was a woman, I left." She wasn't going to tell him she recognized her. He didn't need to know that.

  But Tristan still wouldn't turn. His back was stiff and straight. "Ley, I didn't want you to see that, and she's here all night."

  That made her sit up. "In your room? Our bed?"

  His head snapped around. "Ours?"

  Leyli's mouth opened, but she stopped the words before they could fall out. "Yours."

  He twisted, shifting to see her better. "I told Merino no. He said I don't get a choice. The cunt wanted to spend the whole night, said that made it less shameful."

  "Where is she?"

  His breath rushed out. "Sleeping."

  "At least she wants more than a bull, right?"

  His jaw clenched and he turned a bit more. "I didn't want you to see me like that. I don't care what she paid for. I shouldn't be for sale."

  "But you know how to bend," she said softly, wrapping her arms around his neck. "And if you break, I'll be right here to put you back together. She paid for the Lion and that's all she'll ever get. She'll never know the real Tristan. He's not for sale, just the facade."

  "Oh, Ley." He pulled her closer, hugging her tightly. "That's what I needed, pup. I don't want to lie to you, but didn't know what to say."

  "It's ok." She palmed the back of his head. "I just thought you were mad at me for kicking you in the face. I thought I'd done something wrong and you'd never want to talk to me again."

  He pulled back. "Never. I'm damned proud of you for getting that sword today. I meant to tell you, but when Merino said I'd be..." He cleared his throat, halting that thought. "I just hate the idea of that slut in our bed."

  She heard what he called it and ducked her head. Their bed. A tiny giggle slipped out.

  "Yeah," he said softly. "Everything I have is yours, Ley. Best friends, right?"

  Because they couldn't be anything else. "Right," she agreed. "And all of this is just a distraction until we're both free. Just keep telling yourself that and eventually you'll believe it."


  He chuckled and hugged her again. "I keep trying. Now go back to sleep, we have training in the morning, and my guest isn't going to get either one of us out of it."

  He moved toward the edge of the bed, but she stopped him. "Tristan?"

  "Yeah?" He turned to look at her.

  "What about your children?"

  "I don't have any."

  She took a long breath, forcing herself to ask before she backed out. "How can you be sure? Some of these women are young enough..." Like the Domna. She was still childbearing age.

  He held up a hand. "Some of them are hoping for that. They want to have a baby so much, and are convinced it's their husband's fault, so think I'll make a nice replacement." He groaned and rubbed at his face. "But I gotta do more than stick it in, kid."

  "But... I mean..."

  He chuckled at her discomfort. "I don't do that, Ley. I don't get off in them. I spill on the sheets or the floor, but never in them. Unlike these rich women, my mother made sure I knew exactly what caused children."

  Her face was burning. "I kinda don't."

  Again, he laughed, trying to keep it quiet. "You're cute when you blush. Makes you look all innocent."

  "Tristan!" she hissed, grabbing a pillow with the intent to throw. "You can't see that in the dark!"

  He pressed a hand down on it. "Don't need to, to know you are. Besides, you already beat me today. No need to do it again." Then he got comfortable. "When a couple joins like that, Ley, the friction makes the man spill. It's the completion, not just the act that makes the seed."

  "So, if I..."

  He shook his head. "Usually. The chances are slim, but it's too much of a risk for my partner. I don't want either of us to be slowed down."

  "Yeah."

  Then he grabbed her hand. "I also couldn't live with myself if my child died on the sands. Now, go to sleep."

  Leyli shifted back, then looked at the bed. "I have room if you want it." She paused. "It's not the same without you."

  His eyes darted from her to the open space that would fit him perfectly, then toward his room. "Ley, I was just..."

  "I know. It doesn't matter. The only thing that's important is that you're at the other end of the chain."

  A wistful smile tickled his lips. "Thanks, pup, but it does matter to me. No matter where you came from, you deserve a lot more than a man jumping from his slut's bed into yours."

  "Ours," she whispered.

  "Ours," he agreed, then stood. "And neither of us want to face Merino's wrath if she wakes up and finds me gone."

  All she could do was grab a pillow and toss it where her partner should be. "Then have a good night, Lion." She looked up. "And I'll see you in the morning, Tristan."

  He nodded, then turned for his room. "Thanks, pup."

  A moment later he was gone, the soft thump of the door proving that she was once again alone. Oddly, she fell asleep almost immediately – with a smile on her face. Her last thought was of him standing naked over the Domna, every shadowed muscle pulling her eyes lower on his body. Leyli had never seen two people entangled like that before, but she wasn't that naive.

  Her father had tried to explain what went on between a man and a woman, but he'd failed. Her maid's description had been closer, but it still left out so much. The way that woman had writhed had looked almost painful, but she knew that wasn't the case. She also couldn't imagine another person making her react like that – but she wanted to.

  ***

  The next morning she woke against a solid mass. When she rolled to find a better position, an arm moved around her, pulling her against something warm. Leyli opened her eyes to find Tristan watching her. She smiled.

  "She's gone?"

  "Yeah. Left about an hour ago, just as it started to get light. Said she didn't want to be seen." He pushed her hair away from her face. "Looks like you got some sleep."

  Leyli snuggled into his chest. "Mhm. Did you?"

  "Not much. Cunt couldn't decide if she wanted her bull to snuggle or give her space. Do noble women even sleep with their husbands?"

  "No," she mumbled into his body. "Imagine how hard that would make it for the men to bring home their mistresses."

  He laughed, the sound rumbling through his bones. "Know a lot about mistresses, do ya?"

  "Mhm." She paused to smother a yawn. "Pretty familiar with the topic."

  Beneath her head, Tristan was too still. When she looked up, his eyes were on her, his brow furrowed. Leyli's head twitched, well aware that he was trying to figure something out.

  "What?" she asked.

  "That man who came looking for you. Were you his mistress?"

  She huffed a laugh. "No. I told you. I've never met him before."

  "Ok, so someone who hired him, maybe?"

  She slapped his chest lightly. "You think I'd be some mistress?"

  He lifted a brow and looked at her pointedly. "I think you're pretty damned comfortable in my bed, Ley." Then he grumbled something that sounded like an oath. "Like I have any room to judge. Me, the man that gets sold off by the hour."

  She felt his hands release, and knew that he was about to pull away. Leyli caught his hip, holding him there. "No. Ok? I wasn't someone's mistress."

  "But this bastard has enough money to pay Merino to lose you? He's got enough power to hire someone to check out a gladiator in the games. Leyli, who the hell is this man that you're hiding from?"

  "Don't ask me that."

  "I'm asking." He pressed his hand to the side of her face, making her look up. "I don't care what the answer is, but not knowing is harder than hearing an answer I'd hate."

  "Thought you didn't care what the answer was," she teased, working to shift the topic.

  He pressed a finger between her ribs. "You know what I mean, pup."

  "If you tickle me, I will piss all over the both of us!"

  His hands immediately went up, away from her body. Leyli giggled at him, then rolled off the bed. She headed to the chamber pot and he made himself comfortable, completely at ease with sharing space with her. Leyli finished, then decided to put on real clothes, so her dear partner wouldn't have all the advantages. It seemed he'd gotten dressed before he came to lay beside her in bed.

  She was silent until she belted her shirt around her waist. Then she asked, "So what are we doing today?"

  "You are going to keep me awake, and make sure that none of those novices know I'm anything but formidable."

  She tossed him a disgusted look. "Like that will be hard. Haven't you heard? I'm almost as mean as you."

  "Yep." He pushed himself off the mattress. "It's kinda why I didn't kill you."

  "And here I thought that was just my pretty face. You know, they say Lions are fond of purple." She fell in at his side as they headed to the door.

  Tristan tapped the end of her nose. "Hate to break it to you. That first day it was a lot closer to black. When that bastard slammed your own shield into it, I expected you to pass out and was cussing myself for being chained to a corpse."

  "But you let me live?"

  He shrugged. "I'm pretty sure a guard slipped something in my wine. Otherwise I don't have a very good excuse." Then he rumpled her hair.

  She groaned, trying to pat it back into place. "Fine. If you're going to start that, then you get to braid it."

  "I can do that, but outside."

  "Yeah," she agreed. "Smells like hyacinth in here."

  He looked at her with wide eyes. "Well versed in perfumes, are ya?"

  "That, or the women who wear them. You decide." She grinned, then darted through the door before he could demand more answers.

  It was always the little things that got her in trouble. Balancing on a cart when it moved, identifying perfume, or knowing how nobles slept. He overlooked the big things she did wrong, like having a brother with a prince's name, or putting on royal airs when facing down their owner, but he never let those tiny nuances slip past. And if he saw it, she couldn't help but wonder how many others di
d, too.

  Thankfully, Tristan didn't push. He had no idea how many times she'd nearly broken down and told him everything. There was only one thing stopping her. She couldn't forget how he'd listed her father as being someone he respected. She knew that if she told him she was the last Aravatti child, he'd end up doing something stupid. Back then it would have been to impress her father and get a rudis, but now?

  Now he'd die for a completely different reason. They were partners. Her time alone the night before proved to her just how much she needed him. No matter how hard Merino tried to break him, so long as they had each other, they were invincible. They might die, but they wouldn't be defeated.

  Chapter 23

  She'd been a gladiator for four and a half months and had earned thirty-three victories when the offers for tandem fights stopped coming in. Her ranking was just enough to keep the benefits she'd gotten as Tristan's partner, but she no longer would be fighting at his side. Merino made it clear that the Lion would earn his last fifteen wins on his own merits while she made him some real money. In other words, things were about to get harder for both of them.

  It also changed her schedule. No longer was she free to wake with her partner and train at their own pace. Now, she was required to show up at group sessions, with an outside instructor, hired to make them the best they could be. At least she wasn't moved into different rooms. Merino knew that would be more trouble than it was worth.

  Her first day was miserable. The trainer had once worked in the military and had a fondness for offense. He made them all work with two swords, removing the shield she'd learned to love. Then, much to her dismay, he paired her with Wave. The lean bastard was fast and wiry – exactly the type of fighter that was her bane.

  Over and over they engaged, at the direction of their instructor. All too often, Wave got the advantage, cracking her ribs or hands for the "victory". When he hit her in the face, everything changed.

  The pain came first, like a splash of scalding water. On its heels was the rage. With a roar, Leyli rushed in, battering him like she never had before. Each of his swings, she blocked with a blade or ducked around, but all of hers pummeled the poor guy until she drove him into the sand. Even then, she wasn't about to stop. Leyli was going to prove that she wasn't just some bitch to be knocked around when strong arms pulled her back.